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Review: Innovation

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By Quintin Smith on Dec. 2, 2012

Quinns: The first edition of Innovation, a card game ranked in Board Game Geek’s top 150 games of ALL TIME, looks - as you can see - supernaturally boring.

The tiny box looks like it should contain soviet suppositories, and inside it you’ll find 110 cards in the same hospitalised colour (Lung? Nicotine?). The deathly manual informs you that every one of these cards is an “innovation", from archery to automobiles, and 2-4 players will use them to race from one end of history to the other.

Let’s say you agree to play Innovation, even though it’s clearly not your thing. That experience can be compared to going to drink a tall glass of dirty water, and discovering it’s neat whisky.

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Review: Shadows over Camelot

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By Quintin Smith on Nov. 25, 2012

Quinns: Oh god. OK.

Because board games age so goddamn well, running a board game site can be a bit like running a daycare centre. Those guys can’t rest because it might mean a kid getting stuck behind a radiator or someone eating a rock. We can’t rest because  even if we stay on top of new games, we’re writing under the weight of every awesome game we’ve never played.

Shadows over Camelot is one such older game we need to tell you about. One of HUNDREDS. It never ends, but all the same we’re going to talk about it with the good humour of men throwing a shiny penny into a wishing well.

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Retrospective: Ambush!

Ambush!Retrospectiveshit going down

By Paul Dean on Nov. 22, 2012

Paul: Right then, shall we look inside a box that hasn’t been opened in at least sixteen years?

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Review: Mission- Red Planet

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By Quintin Smith on Nov. 18, 2012

Quinns: What are you doing RIGHT NOW? Swallow that food! Drop that baby! We’ve found a board game you should buy. It’s kind of what we do around here.

Mission: Red Planet is a game of racing to colonise Mars in a congenial, steampunk fashion. 3-5 players jostle to load their tiny astronauts into ships on the launchpad board, these land them on the planet board, and you all try and dominate regions and fulfill secret objectives in a game of area control.

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Review: City of Horror

City of HorrorConnivingZombiesmashed bananasSCUMBAGS

By SU&SD on Nov. 1, 2012

Paul: It’s Hallowe’en! Well, it was Hallowe’en last night. Do you go in for Hallowe’en? I don’t, really. I don’t know if that’s because I’m from Hampshire or not. It’s just, you know, a time associated with throwaway seasonal tat and twenty drunk people all dressed as the same Heath Ledger Joker being sick on public transport—

Quinns: PAUL. THE GAME.

Paul: Right! As is proper, we played a board game for Hallowe’en. Something a bit different. A game that’s both a trick and a treat.

Quinns: A shiny new game called City of Horror. This game made our Hallowe’en. And it’s going to make every Hallowe’en after that.

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Review: Discworld - Ankh Morpork

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By SU&SD on Oct. 19, 2012

Quinns: TWO games based on Terry Pratchett’s Discworld books have come out recently. Don’t worry, though. We’re here to guide you through this difficult time. There’s Guards! Guards! which we’ve heard is about as much fun as actually being arrested, but there’s alsoDiscworld: Ankh-Morpork, which we heard is quite good! So we got it and played it. Isn’t that right, Paul?

Paul: That’s right Quinns, and-

Quinns: That’s right!

Paul: …so the best thing we can say about Discworld: Ankh-Morpork is that it’s equal parts family friendly and utter chaos, so it’s perfect for a Discworld game. Two to four players are trying to gain control of the 12 districts of the city of Ankh-Morpork, clutching at power with their clumsily, pudgy hands as if they’re all trying to model clay on the same pottery wheel.

Quinns: Fingers slipping over oily fingers, all of you swearing, someone’s got clay in their eye, until finally the thing comes to a stop and all you’ve made is a mess.

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The Very Third Shut Up & Sit Down Podcast

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By SU&SD on Oct. 13, 2012

Paul: Another podcast! It’s almost as if they’re becoming a completely irregular thing! Perhaps we’ll have to sort out an RSS feed so that we can sort out a iTunes thing so that we can sort out a WAIT A SECOND, you can just download the third podcast right here.

No, wait, it’s come to our attention that, on a few occasions, it’s not been entirely clear how you can download our podcast. Following Quinns’ advice, here’s something that should help:

CLICK HERE TO GET THE THIRD SHUT UP AND SIT DOWN PODCAST.

(If your browser doesn’t start downloading it, Right-clicking and selecting Save As should do the job quite nicely.)

This podcast reunites us and sees us catch up on what we’ve both been up to. As well as bouncing between topics like a pinball between flippers, this is an important podcast for us for two reasons. First, we’re announcing an exciting thing and second, we’re also asking you, our audience, an important question about a decision we’re thinking of making. But we won’t make it without consulting you first. Does that sound dramatic? Hopefully it’s whetted your appetite and stimulated your curiosity gland.

Regarding that second bit, please do share your views in the comments below, or alternatively email us with your reflections (and even ideas). What you think on this topic is very, very important to us.

Oh yes, we also talk about some GAMES! We’ve got Android: Netrunner, Libertalia, Guts of Glory, Puzzle Strike, Fortress: America, D-Day Dice, Ghost Stories: Black Secret, Mission: Red Planet, The Resistance: Avalon, Agricola, Village and Mage Knight: The Lost Legion.

Right then, these Y-fronts aren’t going to iron themselves.

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Review: Star Wars: X-Wing Miniatures Game

board gamesminiatures gamesmostly gigglesNIGHT BEAST

By Quintin Smith on Oct. 9, 2012

Quinns: BAAAA! Ba-da-baa! Ba-ba-da-ba (ba-ba-ba-ba) ba-ba-da-ba (ba-ba-ba-ba) ba-ba-da-ba (ba-ba-ba-ba) ba-ba-da-ba ba baaaaaa… BA BA BA BAAAA. BAAA! Ba ba ba BAAA ba! Ba ba ba BAAAA ba! Ba-bam-ba-baaaa…

That is me singing the STAR WARS theme. I am singing it for you. It is a special treat.

Fantasy Flight’s owned the Star Wars license for more than a year now, but all that’s meant for us is one passable card game. Until today. The X-Wing Miniatures Game is THE release this month. Tiny, pre-painted spaceships, jinking past lasers that could reduce them to a sneeze in less time than it takes an extra to scream “I’M HIT".

But SHOULD YOU BUY IT? Short answer: “Yes.” Long answer: “Yeeeeeeeeeeaaaaah," followed by a thoughtful pause and a speech like this…

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